A different kind of site for neurodivergent dating
After nearly a decade since its launch, Riverdale-native Thomas Sheil is expanding his dating website for neurodivergent people.
Uneepi, derived from Latin and Greek, means “two become one forever.” The platform operates the same way as popular sites like eHarmony or Match, but is made exclusively for those with autism, Down syndrome, ADHD, dyslexia and Tourette’s syndrome.
Sheil, who grew up on Johnson Avenue and now lives in Manhattan, was inspired by a gap in the system. Most neurodivergent organizations focus on child and adolescent development, but provide little support afterwards, especially for navigating romantic relationships.
Instead of throwing a user “into the deep end” as the site describes, Uneepi also offers a coach who helps individuals learn how to present themselves on a date, foster intimate relationships or process rejection.
“A lot of [neurodivergent] people have trouble relating to and dating people that are not neurodivergent, and I feel like a lot of relationships fail because of that,” Sheil said. “We’re just bringing like-minded people together.”
Inspiration for the 37-year-old was sparked by personal connections. The younger sister of a friend of his has autism and growing up he saw her struggle to make and maintain social connections. Wanting to do something for the community, Sheil created a computer game that helped 6- to 13-year-olds learn how to recognize the emotions connected to facial expressions.
Later, after graduating college, Sheil felt moved by a PBS documentary called “Autism in Love,” which followed adults on the spectrum pursuing relationships. Uneepi was born a few months later, and in 2024 rebranded to include all neurodivergent variations in addition to just autism.
On Uneepi, users enter their age, gender, sexuality and romantic or platonic preferences when creating a profile. From there, prompts get more focused — “I tend to be the center of attention in social gatherings” to “I have a hard time keeping conversations going.”
It’s a violation of health privacy laws to ask someone their diagnosis, Sheil explained, but specific questions can help pair people up better. They can also connect via forums, which pose questions like "Dream dinner guest?" or "Who would win Batman or Superman?" for users to comment under.
To prevent any possibility of a scammer signing up, Sheil manually vets each profile, and he has programming set up to block and remove a user who sends an inappropriate message.
Over the years, the platform has attracted 8,000 users nationwide, the founder said, and resulted in over 65 relationships. But the hope is that it’s only growing.
The company will undergo a major revamp in the next couple of months. Its site will be redesigned with a more modern look, in-person mock-dating events — something curtailed by the COVID-19 pandemic — will occur regularly, and a mobile app will launch that allows users to search based on preferences, or swipe in a way that is similar to Tinder and Hinge. Uneepi will also roll out biweekly episodes of a podcast, called Loving with Autism, cohosted by dating coach Will Ward.
Ward joined the Uneepi team about four months ago, but has known Sheil since the two were freshman year roommates in college. His career started in law enforcement, and transitioned into working with at-risk youth, including those with autism, on crisis management and communication skills.
Coaching neurodivergent adults on romance was an adjustment, Ward said, but came naturally for him. Aside from personalized conversations that help break down anything from what to wear on a date to how to remove oneself if they feel uncomfortable, the largest factor is often confidence.
“The more you build up the person, the better and more effective they are as an individual, whether they’re alone or in a relationship,” Ward said. “Everyone should be comfortable being by themselves. I want to make sure they’re not just dependent on someone else to bring them happiness.”
Neurodivergent dating is no different than neurotypical dating, both Ward and Sheil insist. While Uneepi is about creating a safe environment for those on the spectrum, it is also about breaking down the stigma of neurodivergence.
“Everyone deserves to find love,” Sheil said.
Keywords
Neurodivergent, Dating, Uneepi, Thomas Sheil
